PURITY CULTURE RECOVERY SEX THERAPY IN COLORADO SPRINGS

Colorado Springs is known for many things. The beautiful mountain views. The potholes. The chain restaurants. The fact that every new construction project ends up being a car wash. Beyond that, Colorado Springs has long had a reputation as an evangelical Christian stronghold, which has had a significant impact on the sexual development of many. If you have been impacted by religious views on sex, purity culture, gendered expectations, sexual shame, and fear of repercussions for normal sexual curiosity, you might need the space to figure out who you are as a sexual being without religious dogma or shame hanging over your exploration.

If you have worked hard on deconstructing your religious beliefs, but you notice that sex is still a struggle, you’re in the right place.

Impacts of Purity Culture

This is by no means an exhaustive list, but these could be some of the lingering messages and impacts that you are currently grappling with:

  • Sex is a fundamentally dirty, animalistic, and degrading act

  • My worth is directly tied to my sexual “purity”

  • Sexual desire is inherently problematic

  • Fantasy and sexual thoughts are equivalent to actions

  • Your body is a source of danger and moral danger

  • Your desire and arousal needs to be controlled, rather than something you can trust and follow

  • Rigid gender roles in which sex is something “given” to husbands by their wives

  • Consent is given at the altar and never spoken of again

  • Sex is something that happens, not something that is actively negotiated, communicated about, and discussed frequently

  • Marriage is supposed to make sex “work.” After not talking about sex your whole life, not exploring your desires, and not communicating with your partner about sex, you are expected to flip a switch and suddenly have wonderful, fulfilling, incredible sex with a thumbs up from God.

HOW SEX THERAPY CAN HELP

UNPACKING SHAME MESSAGES AND CREATING NEW NARRATIVES

Sex therapy can help individuals recovering from purity culture by identifying the messages that they still carry with them, the stories about themselves that are getting in the way, and creating new narratives that are based on acceptance and curiosity rather than shame. Sex therapy provides you with a non-judgmental space to separate your erotic identity from the rigid and high-control environment you grew up in.

CONNECTING WITH YOUR BODY AGAIN (OR FOR THE FIRST TIME)

Dissociation is often part of the story for those impacted by purity culture. When you grow up in a context in which thoughts and behaviors are the same thing, shutting down sexual desire is the way to deal with normal human feelings, and hiding is a part of how you survive in that environment. So, it’s no wonder you’ve been disconnecting from your body and compartmentalizing your desires, thoughts, and fantasies while being disconnected from your body. Sex therapy can help you incorporate mindfulness, exploration, curiosity, and help you connect with your body without the pressures of dogma and morality.

OVERCOME SEXUAL DYSFUNCTION

Sexual dysfunctions like vaginismus, anorgasmia, spectatoring, erectile dysfunction, and other sexual difficulties can be linked to conditioned guilt, fear, and shame that leads to erotic shut down. Sex therapy can help you to understand how your thoughts and messages lead to symptoms in your body and help you work towards more pleasurable sexual functioning.

IMPROVED COMMUNICATION IN SEXUAL RELATIONSHIPS

Even with individual sex therapy, clients can learn valuable communication skills to communicate more effectively with their sexual partner or partners. Clients can learn how to advocate for what they want, identify boundaries and sexual limits, communicate their desires, and negotiate their sexual experiences with others in ways that lead to more pleasure, connection, and fun.

You have grown up in a high control environment that attempted to suppress your natural sexuality and you were not given the opportunity to explore the way that you deserved. It’s time for you to take control of your own sexuality to live the more authentic, free, and pleasurable life that always should have been yours. Fill out the form below to get started!